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A Speech for the Opening

I'm in Switzerland right now and since I can't be there with you I wrote this short speech. You get what most people will get. This is practice for life after death, when my presence has to be contained fully in texts and image objects. It will be this at best, people stopping to read what you wrote a long time ago and trying to see a human there.

I have serious aims to divorce my brand name from my biological self. Whatever happens to my body, the name Jaakko Pallasvuo will live on. There's no wrong way to pronounce it. Human bodies will be avatars for an immortal brand essence. This is already happening in fashion. When Alexander McQueen killed himself his company put out an e-mail announcing the death of the "head designer of Alexander McQueen, Lee McQueen". A new artistic director was chosen within the month. I think this model would work well for all the arts. Erase, rewind, replace.

The potato is something that contains the energy of the plant, its will and intention. The potato is the artistic practice of the plant. It doesn't matter what the potato looks like: what matters is that it can create new problems, that it can be consumed. It's a continuation of life on earth. It would be bizarre to look at the potato as an image. The potato is more of a time-based medium.

There are energy objects on the windowsill. They don't look impressive at all, they're pretty ugly. Nathan told me that they smell bad, like cheap paint, he said, although I can't really remember them smelling like anything. They look poorly made and faux-naive. I have a habit of gifting them to people and seeing a look of disappointment on their faces. Two months later they will post a picture of the object on their Facebook and tell everyone how lucky they are to have it. It takes time to accept the object and to become aware of the positive energy it's emitting into its surroundings.

I make the objects when I'm tired and frustrated by being online too much, being too alone and working too much. When my attention span has snapped. All the frustration stays in chats and e-mails and videos and social media behavior. Positive forces come out through the act of forming these blobs. These things are the best of me even if they look like nothing. I've asked for them to be handed out to people at the end of the exhibition. Sofia, Nathan and Alejandro will get one each. They should give the rest to people they care about. Even a year ago I would've thought this was an obnoxious gesture because of how right it is and how uninteresting all the right things are.

I hope that you get really drunk at the opening and accidentally break something and meet someone you think you want to fuck, and maybe later realize want to give other things to as well. I hope when you're walking back home from the afterparty you'll feel unusually light and alive and OK with yourself and the world, and that you won't mind the knowledge that the feeling won't last.


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